so easy...

to forget why we started this journey.

Last night threw an amazing party. Made Siracha Curry Burgers and other grilled meats. Made potato salad. All the food was well received. There was drinking.

Everyone in attendance last night is a composer.

We held a score burning. It was amazing that the other composers were more reticent to burn their scores.

I burned the conductors score used in the first performance of Dance of Disillusionment and Despair as well as the first editing copy.

They're both useless now, as I revised it again before sending it off for competitions.

Woke up late, haven't done anything today. Saw my good friend Scott Blasco had posted a video to his piece Four Songs from the Caucasian Chalk Circle. (you can view it here.) It is a fantastic piece.

Listening to Scott's music reminds me of why I got started down this crazy path. not the bit from undergrad where I was kinda writing, met Carlos, and he showed me the path in composition. not my Masters where i really put it together.

Not even HS, when i had to decide what college I wanted to attend and what major I would be.

Nope, back further. Back watching Der Ring des Nibelungen for the first time with my dad. Sitting at the piano struggling with simple etudes, just wanting to play from the different random volumes of piano pieces we had laying around.

Neither of my parents were "professional" musicians. My mom had piano lessons through HS and flute lessons through college. Almost had a music minor, but really just wanted to play for fun, so didn't do all the theory work needed. My dad was a guitarist and bass player for various bands, though none ever got past being much of a bar band.

I didn't take it seriously till halfway through college. But i've always loved music. Not passively in the "i want to just sit around listening," but i wanted to create music. First, as a player, now as a composer (and sometimes a performer.).

Scott's music is simple and beautiful. Not to say it doesn't have it's complexities and doesn't hold my attention. Far from it. However, there isn't a "hidden agenda" one must first learn before enjoying his music. I don't have to listen and realize "Oh, this is an inverted double mensuration canon!" to get joy from a piece. (Sorry Jeff. I know your love of the inverted double mensuration canon. I love it too. but it is in no way simple and straight forward. lol)

It's something I miss, that simple beauty of a piece. You lay 4 of your 5 cards on the table and it looks like you have 2 pair. That's a good enough hand to win many a game. For those that pay attention, saw how the game unfolded, and catch that wry smile on your face, they know you've got another Jack in your hand, and it's a full house.

That's Scott's music. everyone can see the two pair. If you pay attention, you realize he's got a full-house.

My music is like playing Texas Hold'em and waiting for the river to pull out a winning hand. And no one ever sees what i'm holding till the end...

Sometimes I forget why I got into this whole mess..."Rainbow Connection" on an inexpensive upright, the fun and difficulty of memorizing 10 pieces for a competition, sitting in my bedroom with a cheap Casio keyboard writing short songs with their various patches and recording them with the little two track record function and recording it to a cheap tape deck.

I'm too complicated now. Not sure that'll ever change. I'm jealous of my friends that have success in singer/song-writer style work (guys like Greg Gagnon and his folk/country/blues persona Graham Gregory.).

I think it's time to get back to those roots. remember why I got into this mess. Thank you, Scott Blasco, for reminding me again.